Hilarious

The heights! :-)

Rain...

It was raining for a few days now. He vehemently hated the rain, even worse he hated driving in it. It was all splishy splashy, roads all muddy and the air muggy. Yes, he really hated the rain. He waited in the restaurant for the rain to subside and started driving back home. All the water had made his shoes squeak against the clutch and brake pedals,  adding to his annoyance. The damn rain started again just as he entered the freeway. Visibility was low and he turned on the fog lights and reduced his speed a bit. He kept his eyes peeled to get an ounce of extra visibility. Thats when he spotted the black BMW in his  rear view mirror. The car was following him too close and just when he though it was going to hit him, the driver weaved out of the lane and did some lane acrobatics totally unwarranted on a perfect day- leave alone on a rainy day. His anger rose faster than the mercury on a hot day. Just as the car pulled past him, he saw that the other driver was very young- probably a teenager, hair brushed stiff, probably with the support of a few dozen ounces of gel. His irritation increased, he thought to himself, probably the kid wears his trousers low as is the vogue among a lot of the kids these days. No, he himself was not really old, just middle aged. But the thought of the trousers sitting low below the hip and the bottom end of the trousers all bunched up over the shoes, annoyed him more. What's the whole point of wearing a trouser if you can't cover your butt, he said aloud to nobody in particular.

He saw the BMW start to weave again, this time to take an exit. Whoa! he was going way too fast and he knew that particular exit; it had a very steep turn. "Slow down you A$$!($%#" he shouted and startled himself with the loudness and bitterness of his own voice. Was that thunder? No, he didn't see any lightning. He rubbernecked and preened towards the exit. The car was flattened against the side rails and smoke was coming out. He deserves that, he thought to himself. That was just plain stupid, he clarified to himself; "A BMW doesn't defy the laws of physics". He told himself that if the kid was seriously injured, that would make him learn. "Yeah, can't teach them logic, gotta let evolution weed out the idiots". 

He drove carefully into his garage, got out and as he tenderly carried his infant son out of the rear facing car seat, he couldn't help but think that in a couple of decades his  baby would be that other kid's age. He would probably drive his car way too fast too.  "I hope nothing serious happend to that boy", he abruptly told himself.

PS: This is a work of fiction. No such accident happened and 'He' is not the author or anybody that the author knows.

PPS: Yes, the style is a blatant ripoff from jikku.blogspot.com

There was a group called 'Pessimism'
They used a term: 'deadlines'.

There was another group called 'Optimism'
They used these terms: achieve-lines or goal-lines.

Guess the happier group (there is something in a name don't you think?!)

Deadlines sound so ominous for something you are trying to achieve in a regular work-day.

Krishnaa....Guruvayoorappaaaaa

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.
His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell
his mother what he wanted.

Mom, I want a bike for my birthday.

Little Bobby was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Bobby's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday.

Little Bobby, of course, thought he did.

Bobby's mother wanted Bobby to reflect on his behavior over the last
year. Go to your room, Bobby, and think about how you have behaved this
year. Then write a letter to Krishna and tell him why you deserve a bike for your birthday.

Little Bobby stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write
Krishna a letter.

**************

Letter 1

Dear Krishna,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my
birthday.

I want a red one.

Your friend,

Bobby

**************

Bobby knew that this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this
year. So he tore up the letter and started over.

**************

Letter 2

Dear Krishna,

This is your friend Bobby. I have been a good boy this year and I
would like a red bike for my birthday. Thank you.

Your friend,

Bobby

**************

Bobby knew that this wasn't true either. So, he tore up the letter and
started again.

**************

Letter 3

Dear Krishna,

I have been an OK boy this year. I still would really like a bike for
my birthday.

Bobby

**************

Bobby knew he could not send this letter to krishna either. So, Bobby
wrote a fourth letter.

**************

Letter 4

Krishna,

I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday. Please! Thank you,

Bobby

**************

Bobby knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him
a bike.

Now, Bobby was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mom that he
wanted to go to temple.

Bobby's mother thought her plan had worked, as Bobby looked very sad.
Just be home in time for dinner, Bobby's mother told him. Bobby walked down the street to the temple on the corner. Little Bobby went into the temple and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. Bobby bent down and picked up a statue of the Radha.He slipped the statue under his shirt and ran out of the temple, down the street, into the house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen.

Bobby began to write his letter to Krishna.

**************

Letter 5

Krishna,

I'VE KIDNAPPED YOUR GIRLFRIEND. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE!!!!!!

Haile Gebrselassie, inspiration and a movie

Considered one of the greatest long distance runners and the current marathon world record holder at Berlin 2007, with a finish time of 2:04:26

Here is the last few minutes of the finish.



A CNN clip of him



And while we are talking about running- An inspirational video of the New York City Marathon



And for those of you who have been sufficiently inspired, there is an Indie movie releasing tomorrow (hopefully in a theatre near you)- The spirit of the marathon.
http://www.marathonmovie.com/home.html

What is a widget?

A widget is an application you can easily stick to your own blog page - it is a small window that has been programmed to show you what you want. Check out the Dilbert widget on my blog. The dilbert widget is free for downloading now, and is available in various sizes from http://widget.dilbert.com/


How cool is that?!

Is it really Random?

Most of you know about the perils that I went through on my return journey to SFO from BLR. I have logged it in my personal blog. When I was clearing security check at Washington, I was one of the privileged few to get into a special line.HOORAY !! Feels good to be important, huh? I was told that the selection is random. Is it really random ? Did you know that it is actually the airline that chooses these random people and not the security folks. So, its not your face. Even if you are pretty and seductive, you can still get special treatment.It might work at Customs and Immigration Check though.

My sister who travels a lot is so accustomed to the screening that she enters with wide open arms into the security check ( pun intended!) . She gave me this little tidbit on how to find out if you will be considered a security hazard. Look for “SSSS” in your boarding pass, which translates to a special line with special treatment. Does it stand for Souls requiring Special Security Screening?. No, it is actually Secondary Security Screening Selection.Is the process really random? In my line, most of us were traveling alone, but again there was a family from Ethiopia in front of me. There was a spanish lady with two kids.I would like to believe it is random, but it feels discriminatory if the same people get selected most of the times like my sister. Wikipedia has some answers to these questions. Check this link. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secondary_Security_Screening_Selection

Stock market 101 (Found it interesting so cut & pasted it here)

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10. The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at $20. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms.

The offer rate increased to $25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey let alone catch it.

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him.

In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. “Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at $35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell it to him for $50.”

The villagers squeezed up with all their savings to buy the monkeys. Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, only monkeys everywhere!!

Ramblings

What happens when the world around you comes to a complete stop? What happens when you experience the ultimate shutdown? What happens when you never wake up from your sleep? What happens when you exchange the labels for east and west? What happens when you change your definition of time? What happens when alphabets and numbers end up as being meaningless? What happens when money becomes worthless?

Strange questions, but do we ever think about these events? Enter the world of extreme counterfactuals. Our life revolves around assumptions. We say that there are only 24 hours in the day. Does that always have to be the case. All it requires is changing an assumption on the time scale, converting every half hour to the equivalent of an hour resulting in 48 hour days. Is it worth the trouble? Thats a completely different question, which I dont want to get into here.

Alrighty folks! I'm out of my mind, thoroughly bored and disillusioned. So pardon my ramblings.

[All right Mano. Here is the opportunity you have been waiting for :-)]

D-Day

What day is called the D-Day? Any guesses??? If your answer is June 6, 1944 and the commencement of the Battle of Normandy, a key turning point in the second world war; think again. You just blew away a million dollars worth of prize money! D-Day is January 7th. It has the unique record of having the maximum number of divorces filed in the United States. The pattern seems to repeat every year.

Well Children's day, Valentine's day, Independence day blah blah...but Divorce-Day????? Imagine getting booted out of your house in the middle of January (its worse as u head north). Imagine getting divorce papers as I prepare to watch the super bowl or the BCS title game (hmm for all u guys interested in pulling my leg...i agree OSU lost again but we will be back next year...same day different place though). It is interesting that the day when most divorce cases are filed happens to be early January. One would expect the Christmas season to be filled with joy, but evidence suggests that this is not the case for several people. getting booted out of one's home in the middle of January can be painful.

Hmm..so much for a new year resolution or HAPPY HOLIDAYS...lol